So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
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