Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
They have beer where we have blood.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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