how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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