Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
