i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize