Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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