I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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