but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
