shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Randomize
