I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
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