New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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