I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
