We're like a lot better than the average bears
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
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