The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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