I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
