i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
as a side note pls kill me
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize