i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
