Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
