apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize