Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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