she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
