the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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