Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Randomize
