Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
