There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Why are your pants in the freezer?
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
