Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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