My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
