Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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