We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
Randomize
