But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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