I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
You took a bar mat shot.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
