I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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