yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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