if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
