I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Randomize
