See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize