Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize