You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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