two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
