no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
