her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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