i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Randomize