I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
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I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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