Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
tell me about the eggs
Randomize