I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Randomize