We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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