no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
You pole danced in your parka.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize