I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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