I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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