so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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